Flashing fuel light
my tank is running low.
Grip the wheel tight
knuckles cold as snow
I don’t need the light
to know that I’m empty.
I feel it take flight
I know when it’s left me
Should I refill?
the price of gas is high.
Drink what makes me ill
and fuel this firefight?
I don’t know what to do
I’ve never run on empty
but I do know that I choose
to drive on roads that tempt me
I’ll drive a little longer
until my gas is gone.
My flashing light will falter
but nothing will be wrong
For the first time in ages
I’ll step outside my car.
I’ll stop writing pages
in my diary of scars.
Usually, it's a good thing to "refill" and a bad thing to run on empty. But, as I was working through the analogy for this poem, I wondered if sometimes it's better to let ourselves run out. I guess this depends on what kind of fuel we're using, and where we're going. In my case, I feel like sometimes I fuel myself on unhealthy things even though I'm trying to get to a good place (such as writing poetry). This fuel can be anything from music to spending some time alone, which aren't bad things in themselves. But sometimes, in an effort to create "good" things, I convince myself I need to stay in my "car," or keep feeling a certain way. It's a similar idea to my last poem, but maybe a little clearer.
I'm not really sure how to let myself run out of fuel when I need to. It's scary, and sounds a lot like giving up. But maybe it's more like taking a pit-stop or even rechecking the map to make sure I'm heading in the right direction. Maybe healing even comes with it. I don't know, but I think it's definitely worth looking into.
I hope you have a wonderful week!
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